As my visit to Steamboat (for my sister’s birthday weekend) got closer, the snow and blustery weather left me agonizing over the drive. I love road trips – but the thought of driving in winter conditions often leaves me anxious.
I live in a small town where I rarely drive my vehicle. I love that I can pedal or walk to visit friends and do most of my errands; I prefer not to drive, except for a road trip.
As the day to leave approached the weather grew clear and calm and I brushed aside the forecast that included snow later in the weekend.
My mind focused on the treat (besides celebrating with my sister) I had planned for myself – snowshoeing Rabbit Ears Pass. The drive was uneventful, and when I reached the trailhead atop Rabbit Ears Pass I was giddy with anticipation.
I don’t know the area well, and I was glad when a returning skier mentioned they had broken trail on the four-mile loop I planned to ‘shoe’. After a quick look at the map I was on my way.
I like to imagine whether I feel the shape of the trail I am traversing. And since I am not fantastic with orienteering it quells any anxiety that might build about whether I am truly headed in the ‘right’ direction. Fortunately the blue-diamond shaped trail markers seemed to appear each time this anxious anticipation arose.
I let my anticipation melt away as I soaked in the fresh air, natural beauty and serenity that sunny winter afternoon.
As I enjoyed the remainder of the weekend with my sister and seeing an old friend, I tried not to anticipate a snowy drive home. It did turn out to be a snowy drive home – but the visibility was OK and taking it slowly I arrived home safe and sound.
Anticipation can be anxious and exciting. Learning not to be anxious is often a challenge for me, and I often use my journal to work through these emotions.